Chuck Norris made a mistake once and it corrected itself.
Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.
Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
All men are born equal. Chuck Norris was just born more equal than everyone else.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
Chuck Norris' toothpaste doesn't have baking soda in it, it has gunpowder in it.
Salmon swim upstream because Chuck Norris is downstream.
Jason Bourne fought Chuck Norris but he can't remember because now he has amnesia.
Chuck Norris can milk birds.