Chuck Norris isn't a good shot, his bullets just know better than to miss.
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There is no theory of evolution.
Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
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Wet doesn't get Chuck Norris Chuck Norris gets wet.
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Chuck Norris once gave blood, it was put in cans and labelled 'Red Bull'.
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Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar.
The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
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In the back of the book of world records, it says "All records are held by Chuck Norris. The ones listed are in second place."
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When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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Chuck Norris invented the spoon because it's too easy to kill someone with a knife or fork.
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Chuck Norris got into Cambridge... without any qualifications.
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Chuck Norris can hit you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA.
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Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet.
That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
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