Chuck Norris isn't a good shot, his bullets just know better than to miss.
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Death was created after Chuck Norris was born.
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Chuck Norris caught a bullet with the same gun he fired it from.
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Chuck Norris doesn't run for President; the President runs for Vice God Chuck Norris.
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The last thing that you see before you die, is Chuck Norris.
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The best part of waking up is not the Folgers in your cup, it's knowing that Chuck Norris didn't kill you in your sleep.
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Chuck Norris doesent need a postage stamp...
He just tells the letter where to go and it gets there.
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Chuck Norris never gets dirty.
The dirt is too afraid to even touch him or his clothes.
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Chuck Norris doesn't die...he just sleep in the ground for a little bit.
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If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
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Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
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