Chuck Norris once lapped his opponent...in a drag race.
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Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
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Chuck Norris once won a staredown over a walkie talkie.
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What do you spell if you rearrange the letters in Chuck Norris's name.
Nothing, because you can't mess with Chuck Norris.
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Contrary to popular belief there was a Chuck Norris sighting on the set of The Crow.
No Lee is allowed to live when Chuck Norris is around.
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Every bone inside Chuck Norris is his funny bone, cause he laughs wherever you hit him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't blow out brithday candles, they surrender their flames willingly.
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In an attempt to end WWII, President Harry Truman had Chuck Norris parachuted into Hiroshima and Nagasaki.
Sept. 2, 1945, the Japanese surrendered.
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They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
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Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
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Chuck Norris removes the tag from mattresses, and mails them back to the company.
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