Chuck Norris has never won a single fight. Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
The last thing that you see before you die, is Chuck Norris.
There was no world recession, just Chuck Norris desiring a discount.
When Chuck Norris says "Jump", you don't say, "How high?" - you say, "When do I come down?"
When somebody is all up in your face, just be glad that that someone is NOT Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once separated his powers into five people, they are now called The Avengers.
If Charlie Sheen is winning, it's only because Chuck Norris isn't playing.
Chuck Norris CAN leave Hotel California.
Chuck Norris' beard has a tattoo.
When Chuck Norris talks, people listen. When he doesn't, people still listen.
Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.