Chuck Norris never needs help, help needs Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can skip a sound track on the radio if he doesn't like it.
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Never ask Chuck Norris for an autograph.
Why?
Because Chuck's signature is a straight roundhouse kick to the face.
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When Chuck crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
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According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
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Where was your mom last night?
At Chuck Norris' place.
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Justin Bieber has Chuck Norris fever!
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Chuck Norris went on Man vs Wild once.
The Wild lost.
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Chuck Norris could stab you with a worm.
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There was no Big Bang at the beginning of the Universe, Chuck Norris simply sneezed.
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Simply by pulling on both ends, Chuck Norris can stretch diamonds back into coal.
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