Chuck Norris never needs help, help needs Chuck Norris.
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Tornadoes have sirens to warn them when Chuck Norris is coming.
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Chuck Norris can comment on Facebook posts, before you publish them.
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It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.
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A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
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He opens the door then turns the handle.
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Chuck Norris caught all the pokemon with a Nokia 3310.
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If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
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People say "bless you" when you sneeze because Chuck Norris might catch your soul.
It's a myth.
Chuck Norris can take your soul whenever he wants.
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Chuck Norris does not submit to homeland security, he IS homeland security.
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Chuck Norris does not sleep.
He waits.
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