When Jacques Cousteau reached the bottom of the sea he found Chuck Norris snorkeling.
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Kim Kardashian use to be 8 feet tall until Chuck Norris uppercut both her feet and that is why her ass is so big.
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Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
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When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
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The Dead Sea was formerly known as The Living Sea.
Until it met Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesent need a postage stamp...
He just tells the letter where to go and it gets there.
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Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
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Chuck Norris once lapped his opponent...in a drag race.
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Chuck norris recently received a restraining order barring him from getting closer then half a mile from Satan.
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At museums Chuck Norris is allowed to touch the art.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need to breathe, the oxygen comes to him.
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