Chuck Norris jumped off a building once.
The ground didn't make it.
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Chuck Norris has a six-pack on his chin.
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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The Holy Grail is in Chuck Norris's living room.
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They once had a showing of Walker Texas Ranger in 3D.
There where no survivors.
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Chuck Norris can eat soup with a fork.
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Chuck Norris got elected for president, even though he didn't run for anything.
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When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who can write history of the future.
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Chuck Norris does Rachel Marron's work.
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