Chuck Norris didn't grow a beard, a beard grew Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
When you insult Chuck Norris, the next thing you are going to see is a bunch of halos.
Chuck Norris is the only man who can put M&M's in alphabetical order.
Chuck Norris can win an argument with his wife.
Anybody can outdo the impossible, but nobody can outdo Chuck Norris.
The Guinness Book of World Records is actually Chuck Norris' elementary school report card.
Chuck Norris knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop.
A body in motion will remain in motion until roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can skydive indoors.
To be roundhouse-kicked by Chuck Norris means getting his autograph.