Chuck Norris didn't grow a beard, a beard grew Chuck Norris.
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When nature calls Chuck Norris hangs up.
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Every phobia known to man has a phobia of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris passed a kidney stone once.
That stone is now known as The Death Star.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones but Chuck Norris' fists will kill you.
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Chuck Norris can eat rice with one chop stick.
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In 1986 the U.S.S.R. attempted to clone Chuck Norris.
The scientists failure was covered up and we now know their attempt as the Chernobyl disaster.
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Chuck Norris uses flatbed trailers as roller skates.
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Chuck Norris has the iPhone 5...he got it back in '84.
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The saying "Kill two birds with one stone" actually came from when chuck Norris downed two Peregrin Falcons with one roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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