Q: What's the easiest way to a persons heart?
A: Chuck Norris' fist
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When Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack.
Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes ever.
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July 4th is Independence day.
And the day Chuck Norris was born.
Coincidence? I think not.
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A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people.
It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
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The Grimm Reaper fears the day Chuck Norris comes for him.
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People have near-death experiences. Death has Near-Chuck-Norris experiences.
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Chuck Norris got into Cambridge... without any qualifications.
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Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris kicked the world once, it hasn't stopped spinning.
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Chuck Norris uses pepper spray to clear his sinuses.
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To run away from Chuck Norris man invented a car, then to catch them Chuck Norris invented crashes.
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