Chuck Norris is the only person that can deliver a roundhouse kick in full 1080p, remember that the next time you watch Walker Texas Ranger in Blu-Ray.
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Chuck Norris isn't on Earth, the Earth is on Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't sweat.
He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.
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When Chuck Norris wants salad, he eats a vegetarian.
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When Chuck Norris pours a bowl of Rice Krispies, they shut the hell up!
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When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive.
The zombies do.
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Chuck Norris donated his heart to a hospital... twice.
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They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
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Physics is bound by the laws of Chuck Norris.
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Once Chuck Norris signed a cheque and the bank bounced.
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Chuck Norris has a daugter: Jason Bourne.
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