The universe expands because the stars believe this way will be safer from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can throw a house through a window.
Chuck Norris does not require food, drink, shelter, or sleep, only confirmed kills.
Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
Chuck Norris can unlock a hairpin with a door.
Chuck Norris won the Nascar season, he was driving a bike.
Chuck Norris can blow up things, without a bomb.
Chuck Norris gave Iceman frostbite.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris won a guitar battle with a violin.
Give Chuck Norris a piece of coal and he'll give you back a diamond.