Chuck Norris couldn't act in Titanic because he would have saved everyone.
He who lives by the sword, dies by the sword. He who lives by Chuck Norris, dies by the roundhouse kick.
In fourth grade, a teacher edited Chuck Norris's essay. Big mistake. You don't edit Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris edits you... with his fist.
Chuck Norris is the reason why This Little Piggy cried wee wee wee all the way home.
Many years ago Chuck Norris and a brown bear had a fight. The loser had to go live in the north pole.
Chuck Norris once broke a mirror over the head of a black cat while standing under a ladder on Friday the thirteenth. The next day he won the lottery.
Chuck Norris has never taken a test, because no one questions Chuck Norris.
If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
Kanye West interupted Chuck Norris and became Kanye East.