Chuck Norris' shadow stays ten steps behind him in fear of a roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a GPS. Chuck Norris decides where he is.
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
Chuck Norris went for a swim in the ocean. The sharks headed for land.
If you stare at the ameican flag long enough you'll see a 3D image of Chuck Norris.
The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
Chuck Norris can clog the toilet with his pee.
Finally, they discovered real cause of Bruce Lee's death – extreme exhaustion from fight with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris Doesn't breakdance. He breaks dance
Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.