Chuck Norris never has a deja vu. No scene would be that stupid to appear in front of the man twice.
When Chuck Norris says 'Candyman' five times in a row, no one appears. Candyman ain't stupid.
Chuck Norris doesn't need his seatbelt becouse no one is stupid enough to hit him.
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
Once Chuck Norris rubbed a magical lamp, nothing came out. The genie ain't stupid.
Chuck Norris was supposed to be in the movie Halloween but the director thought it would be kind of stupid for Michael Meyers to stab himself in fear.
The last digit of pi is Chuck Norris. He is the end of all things.
A bulletproof jacket is an imitation of Chuck Norris' beard.
Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.
Pritam is driving down the Delhi-Amritsar highway when he spots his friend Shankar standing in the middle of a huge field of grass. He pulls the car over to the side of the road and notices that Shankar is just standing there, doing nothing, looking at nothing. Pritam gets out of the car, walks all the way out to Shankar and asks him, "Excuse me, what are you doing?" Shankar replies, "I'm trying to win a Nobel Prize." "How?" asks Pritam, puzzled. "Well, I heard they give the Noble Prize to people who are outstanding in their field."
While reading the newspaper, Walter came across an article about a beautiful actress and model who married a boxer who was not noted for his IQ. "I'll never understand," he said to his wife, "why the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives." His wife replied: "Thank you, dear!"