Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier.
In half.
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Even though Chuck Norris' lives in Dallas, Texas, his house still has spectacular views of both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
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Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.
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Chuck Norris can split the atom.
With his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris makes his own Girl Scout cookies using real Girl Scouts.
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The universe expands because the stars believe this way will be safer from Chuck Norris.
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After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
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Facebook wants to add Chuck Norris as a Friend.
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When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
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When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
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Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row.
The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
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