Chuck Norris rubs two pieces of fire together to make wood.
Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics... In the summer.
Chuck Norris once climbed Mt. Everest in 15 minutes, 14 of which he was building a snowman at the bottom.
The world won't end in 2012, it will end when Chuck Norris gets bored of it.
Chuck Norris is the real man inside of Chucky.
Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
Chuck Norris thinks that anyone who can't survive cranial impact with a steam hammer simply isn't making an effort.
Chuck Norris dosn't need a bullet proof vest because the bullets wouldn't dare hit him.
When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror, he gets jealous.
Physics is bound by the laws of Chuck Norris.