Chuck Norris rubs two pieces of fire together to make wood.
R. Lee Ermey's war face is the face he made when he saw Chuck Norris ready to attack.
When God said "Let there be light!", Chuck Norris said "Only for half the day."
Aliens fear that Chuck Norris might abduct them.
Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one. When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face. We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
You've heard that Chuck Norris counted to infinity twice, right? Well he's currently making his third attempt.
Chuck Norris reads with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris walked into a bar. "OUCH!" said the bar.
Justin Timberlake didn't bring sexy back Chuck Norris did.
Chuck Norris can stand the rain...
Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.