Chuck Norris doesn't push someone out of the way of a car, he pushes the car out of the way of the person.
Chuck Norris can turn carbon paper into diamonds.
Chuck Norris can eat just one pringle.
Chuck Norris got a perfect SAT score by just putting his name on the paper...
After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
Cement took a teaspoon of Chuck Norris to harden up!
Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg was recently hospitalize, because Chuck Norris poked him.
Chuck Norris cannot be put in a corner. The corner always backs away.
There used to be a street named after Chuck Norris, but it was changed because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.