Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
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If Chuck Norris says his opinion on somthing, it automaticlly becomes a fact.
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Chuck Norris tells his GPS when he wants to turn.
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Chuck Norris invented half when he round house kicked the number 1
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Chuck Norris can use a touch screen without touching it.
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Chuck Norris doesn't ask, "who's your daddy?"
Chuck Norris is your daddy.
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Chuck Norris once won a blinking contest against a statue!
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Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
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Chuck Norris digs up gold - from silver linings.
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Chuck Norris can unscramble eggs.
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Chuck Norris can play volleyball with a bowlingball.
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