Chuck Norris's wish isn't your command, Chuck Norris's command is your wish...
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Bill Gates once asked Chuck Norris to be his personal body guard for an hour, he couldn't afford it...
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An eclipse is just the suns attempt to hide from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use OFF!
Mosquitos instinctively know not to bite him.
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Chuck Norris can turn a vegan into a cannibal.
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Q: What's the difference between Chuck Norris and a bear?
A: Chuck Norris has more chest hair.
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Chuck Norris once ate four 30lb bowling balls without chewing.
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Chuck Norris brings his fists to gunfights.
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If Chuck Norris were to get into a fight with another Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris would win.
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Chuck Norris has heard the actual voice of Charlie Brown's teacher...
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In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you, including the room itself.
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