An ancient Chinese prophecy states that a man will be created to protect the lands from all evil. Chuck Norris killed that man.
Chuck Norris' driver's license simply shows his shoe size.
Chuck Norris can scratch sandpaper.
Chuck Norris can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
Chuck Norris does not submit to homeland security, he IS homeland security.
Chuck Norris can see at least 3 extra colors.
Chuck Norris puts the fun in funeral.
King Kong climbed the Empire State Building because Chuck Norris was waiting at the bottom.
There were 3 people on a boat, Chuck Norris, Jesus, and the Penelope, Jesus said "I bet I can walk across the water." He did, Chuck Norris tried, he did, the Penelope said "They did it that means I do it." , He tried, he sank, Jesus said: "Should I have told him about the rocks?" Chuck Norris said "What rocks?"
Chuck Norris plays racquetball with a waffle iron and a bowling ball.