Chuck Norris can break air.
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Nails wish they were as tough as Chuck Norris.
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Chuck Norris is the only person who could truly judge a book by its' cover.
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They once made a "Chuck Norris" brand toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
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The tides don't change because of the moon; the sea just wants to be as far away as possible from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
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One time Chuck Norris saluted an American flag and it blushed.
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Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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If you click on start, run, then type in Chuck Norris you will get a permanent blue screen of death.
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