Chuck Norris doesn't smoke cigars.
He smokes smoke grenades.
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When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
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If Chuck Norris was in a video game it would be called Immortal Kombat.
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People believe in God. God believe in Chuck Norris.
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The earth doesn't revolve around the sun.
It's the sun that revolves around Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once went sky diving, he did not use a parachute.
The spot he landed on is now known as the Grand Canyon.
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Sharks are not living on the sea because they can't breath on continent.
They live on a sea, because Chuck Norris doesn't.
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If you use Chuck Norris in a game of Rock-Paper-Scissors, you automatically win.
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Atlas doesn't drop the earth because he knows Chuck Norris lives in it.
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Chuck Norris once went to practice his golf swing at a driving range... his golf balls are now known as stars!
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Chuck Norris CAN read Lady Gaga's poker face.
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