Chuck Norris cancelled his own funeral.
Chuck Norris can make you laugh at your own funeral.
Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
Chuck Norris puts the fun in funeral.
It is convenient to be near a hospital when you are injured. It is also convenient to insult Chuck Norris while standing in an open grave.
Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
Chuck Norris knows the secret of the Caramilk
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris is the real man inside of Chucky.
I used to hate weddings, all the old ladies would prod me and say "you'll be next!" They soon stopped that, when I started saying it to them at funerals !
I took my grandma to a fish spa center where the little fish eat your dead skin for only $45. It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.