Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
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Chuck Norris actually died a while back.
Death just can't get the nerve to tell him.
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Chuck Norris can make a pound cake with only an ounce.
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Chuck Norris doesn't just bring home the bacon, he brings home the whole pig.
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When Chuck Norris played the card game War with a friend, France surrendered.
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Chuck Norris doesn't worry about high gas prices.
His vehicles run on fear.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t swim, we beats the water into submission.
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Chuck Norris shaves with a hunting knife.
"Shaving" consists of cutting a new mouth-hole every morning.
That's how tough his beard is.
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Bill Gates owes Chuck Norris money.
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Harry Potter needs 8 movies to seek and destroy Voldemort.
Chuck Norris needs 4 seconds.
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Chuck Norris doesn't cry.
His eyes sweat.
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