Chuck Norris can find a hay in a needle stack.
When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
While urinating, Chuck Norris is easily capable of welding titanium.
Chuck Norris built Rome with a box of scraps.
One time Chuck Norris saluted an American flag and it blushed.
When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
Chuck Norris doesn't give warnings. He doesn't have to, you should already know.
If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
Chuck Norris was once so famished, he ate Turkey. The country there now is only an impostor.