When Chuck Norris put his hand over a magnet, the magnet comes to him out of pure fear.
Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
Chuck Norris has never won an Academy Award for acting... because he's not acting.
Chuck Norris once won a Poker tournament using only Pokemon cards.
Chuck Norris can make a Java Program in visual studio 2010.
Chuck Norris froze hell.
Chuck Norris jumped off a building once. The ground didn't make it.
Did you know the Dinosaurs crossed Chuck Norris? But only once.
When Clark Kent goes into a phonebooth, Superman comes out. When Chuck Norris goes into a phone booth, it explodes and Chuck walks away.
Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
The only time Chuck Norris made a mistake was when he thought he made a mistake