The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
Chuck Norris walked right into Area 51, bought a Snapple, and walked out. No one dared to move.
In a fight between Jackie Chan and Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris would win. No questions.
Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
Chuck Norris does not go fishing, the fish surrender.
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
Chuck Norris can smoke underwater.
Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
Kids dream about having superpowers. Superpowers dream about having Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris forgets something it ceases to exist.
Q: What do a bungee jump cord and a hooker have in common? A: If the rubber breaks you're screwed.