The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
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After being shot by a criminal, Chuck Norris said... "that tickles".
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If Chuck Norris had to he could give CPR to himself.
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When Chuck Norris cuts onions, the onins cry.
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In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size.
When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
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We have a week dedicated to sharks... sharks have a week dedicated to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris used to date Hurricane Katrina.
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Chuck norris can fix a plumbers crack.
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Chuck Norris lost both his legs in a car accident, but he still managed to walk it off.
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Chuck Norris can whistle in five different languages, including sign language.
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Chuck Norris is the only person to know pi, because when he puts it into the calculator, the calculator doesn't dare give him only part of it.
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