Simon doesn't say... Chuck Norris says.
A few guys tried to follow Chuck Norris during a light workout while he was vacationing in Hawaii. It's now called the Ironman Triathlon.
Death once had a near Chuck Norris experience.
The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
Chuck Norris can strangle you with a cordless phone.
Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
Time waits for no man. Unless that man is Chuck Norris.
It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris has a grizzly bear carpet in his room. The bear isn't dead it is just afriad to move.
Chuck Norris can access private methods.
Chuck Norris can send you a roundhouse kick by E-Mail.