Bears only poop in the woods when Chuck Norris says its ok..
Q: Do you know why infinity goes on forever? A: Because it knows Chuck Norris is waiting for it at the end.
Rather than being birthed like a normal child, Chuck Norris instead decided to punch his way out of his mother’s womb.
Chuck Norris injected his blood into a monkey, a fish, and a lizard. They are now known as King Kong, Jaws, and Godzilla.
Chuck Norris can build a house from the roof down.
Newton's Third Law is wrong: Although it states that for each action, there is an equal and opposite reaction, there is no force equal in reaction to a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris put his phone on air-plane mode and flew it.
Chuck Norris can fire Vince McMahon.
Chuck Norris sprinted 2 marathons - backwards.
Even though Chuck Norris' lives in Dallas, Texas, his house still has spectacular views of both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.
Chuck Norris can eat rice with one chop stick.