Chuck Norris does not get parking tickets;
he gets "thank you for parking anywhere" notes.
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Chuck Norris broke the law once.
It still isn’t fixed.
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Chuck Norris actually painted all of the colors of the wind.
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Chuck Norris can't get a riddle wrong.
The riddle can only have the wrong answer.
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Chuck Norris can stop the music.
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Chuck Norris can text using a rotary phone.
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A train saw Chuck Norris on the track and turned down a dirt road.
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Chuck Norris inhales carbon monoxide and exhales oxygen.
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Most kids pee their name into snow...
Chuck Norris pisses his in concreate...
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Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant.
The steak did what it was told.
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