Chuck Norris can scratch sandpaper.
When you're Chuck Norris, anything + anything is equal to 1. One roundhouse kick to the face.
Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f***ing Indian.
Chuck Norris goes to the Bermuda Triangle for vacation.
Someone asked Chuck Norris to climb Mount Everest. After his 10th endeavor, he wrote a book. "Ten Different Ways to Climb Mount Everest"
Chuck Norris CAN have it both ways.
They say terror? Look at Chuck.
Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra .... After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra Eventually died
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
Chuck Norris is the reason why George Michael is never gonna dance again.
Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.