Joke #9516

Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
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Chuck Norris doesn't run out of patience, patience runs out of him from fear of a roundhouse kick to the face.
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Newton's 3rd Law never applies to Chuck Norris.
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Show me a man with a nub for an index finger, and I'll show you a man that asked Chuck Norris to "Pull my Finger"
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Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting implies the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
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When Chuck goes into outer space his head doesn't pop, space pops around his head!
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You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right? Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla". Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
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Chuck Norris can stop the music.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
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