Most tough men eat nails for breakfast.
Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
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Bruce Lee is the only person that lived from a roundhouse kick from Chuck Norris.
He died a year later.
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Sticks and stones may break your bones, but Chuck Norris' glare will liquify your kidney.
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Chuck Norris has hair of steel wool.
That's why his mullet never moves.
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Chuck Norris got elected for president, even though he didn't run for anything.
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Willy Wonka gave an everlasting gobstopper to Chuck Norris.
The flavor lasted 2.3 seconds.
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Chuck Norris found the stairway to heaven, but he prefers the elevator.
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Chuck Norris doesn't shave, his beard grows to the perfect length and stops.
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Chuck Norris commited suicide, and lived.
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Michael Jackson does moonwalk because he doesn't have time to turn and run away from Chuck Norris.
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