The only sure things are Death and Taxes…and when Chuck Norris goes to work for the IRS, they'll be the same thing.
Chuck Norris can experience a once in a life time occurrence... twice.
Each hair on Chuck Norris' beard holds the soul of a victim.
When Chuck Norris goes to the beach, he puts on sunscreen to protect the sun from him.
Chuck Norris doesn't age, he levels up!
Do you know why God is called "God"? Because "Chuck Norris" is already taken.
Chuck Norris never gets dirty. The dirt is too afraid to even touch him or his clothes.
Chuck Norris sends paper letters through email.
hen Chuck Norris goes fishing he stands at the edge of the water and says: "Don`t make me go in there to get you".