Three seconds after Chuck Norris was shot, the bullet came out screaming.
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When Chuck Norris kills time, that'll be the end of it.
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Chuck Norris can do the splits in mid air,rotate his hips 360" so fast it lifts him off the ground thus making the Chuck Copter!
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Chuck Norris doesn't travel at the speed of light, light travels at the speed of Chuck Norris!
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Chuck Norris graduated from the School of Hard Knocks with an MBA - Mega Bad Ass.
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Wanna know how Chuck Norris grew his beard?
He didn't, his beard grew him.
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According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan.
When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
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Chuck Norris shot an arrow down with an apple.
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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
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When Chuck Norris enters a sauna the sauna starts sweating.
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Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics...
In the summer.
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