Chuck Norris reads with his eyes closed.
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If you write the Death Note on Chuck Norris, the Death Note dies.
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Chuck Norris throws a dodgeball at you, knocks all your teeth out.
Then the ball hits you.
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Cement took a teaspoon of Chuck Norris to harden up!
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Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
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If Chuck Norris were to ever bungee jump, the earth would flinch.
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Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
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Chuck Norris can stand at the bottom of a bottomless pit.
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Death has a shadow... Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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In honor of Chuck Norris, all McDonald's in Texas have an even larger size than the super-size.
When ordering, just ask to be "Norrisized".
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