Chuck Norris reads with his eyes closed.
Chuck Norris walked into the gold and silver pawn shop in Las Vegas. They made a deal. Chuck now owns the shop.
When Chuck Norris talks, people listen. When he doesn't, people still listen.
Chuck Norris doesn't sleep with a teddy bear. He sleeps with a real bear.
Chuck Norris knows who A is.
When Chuck Norris gets angry, forests explode from their own boiling sap. When Chuck Norris laughs, flowers bloom and butterflies hatch.
Chuck Norris used to date Hurricane Katrina.
Chuck Norris has heard the actual voice of Charlie Brown's teacher...
Chuck Norris never suffers from a heart attack. His heart is too smart to not attack him.
Chuck Norris can run a nuclear power station using a rowing machine.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.