The reason the Holy Grail has never been recovered is because nobody is brave enough to ask Chuck Norris to give up his favourite coffee mug.
If it walks like a duck, talks lidek a duck, and smell like a duck but Chuck Norris says it's a girrafe. It's a damn girrafe!
If they made a movie of Chuck Norris standing still, it would be rated R for extreme violence.
Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
You've heard that Chuck Norris counted to infinity twice, right? Well he's currently making his third attempt.
Chuck Norris keeps a list of all his victims, it's called the phone book.
Chuck Norris owns the gold color at the end of the rainbow.
Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
Chuck Norris can kill your imaginary friends.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can write history of the future.
During the Vietnam War, Chuck Norris allowed himself to be captured. For torture, they made him eat his own entrails. He asked for seconds.