What is a cow's favourite TV show?
Dr Moo.
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Why did the jellyfish's wife leave him?
He stung her into action.
Why is there no gambling in Africa?
-Too many Cheetahs!
A firefighter was working on the engine outside the Station, when he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle.
The girl was wearing a firefighter's helmet.
The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat.
The firefighter walked over to take a closer look.
"That sure is a nice fire truck," the firefighter said with admiration.
"Thanks," the girl replied.
The firefighter looked a little closer.
The girl had tied the wagon to her dog's collar and to the cat's testicles.
"Little partner," the firefighter said, "I don't want to tell you how to run your rig, but if you were to tie that rope around the cat's collar, I think you could go faster."
The little girl replied thoughtfully, "You're probably right, but then I wouldn't have a siren."
Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast.
They taste like chicken.
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Q: What will a giraffe do, if you spit in its face?
A: It will kick off your ladder…
Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes?
A: The guy who gave it to him.
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A fish walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "What would you like?" the fish says holding his neck, "Water".
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road without looking both ways?
"Dead."
Your mom's so dumb, she threw the dog and told the stick to fetch!
