The best kids jokes

A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you.” The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?” The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” said the barber. “That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. “Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?” The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”
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has 40.80 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: food, kids, money
The song Santa Claus is Coming To Town was originaly called Chuck Norris is Coming To Town. They changed it so the children wouldn't live in fear.
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has 40.80 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, kids, Santa
When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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has 40.67 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fat, kids
Q: What do the mosquito parents say to their small children, when they see people lying on the sandy beach during a hot summer day more than 15 minutes? A: "Kids, prepare the cutlery and your chin-straps. Our lunch is already heated up and ready for the consumption!"
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has 40.53 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, kids, time, weather
The cop got out of his car and the kid, who was stopped for speeding, rolled down his window. “I’ve been waiting for you all day,” the cop said. The kid replied, “Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could.” When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.
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has 40.39 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: cop, kids
Heres what you do: 1. Dinner 2. Kiss 3. Movie 4. Sex 5. Bring her back home 6. Get paid 15 bucks for babysitting
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has 40.31 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dating, kids, money, sex
What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breath!!!!
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has 40.24 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: kids
Whats the difference between a jew camp and a summer camp? The kids come back.
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has 40.21 % from 129 votes. More jokes about: black humor, jewish, kids
Yo momma so ugly that she made all her blind kids cry.
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has 40.09 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: insulting, kids, ugly, Yo mama
An Arabic kid joined my football team. All he did was blow the plays.
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has 40.07 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: black humor, ethnic, football, kids, racist
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