Please let me know in advance if you want to invite any secret love children to your Father's Day brunch.
Billy: What a pair of strange socks you're wearing, one is green and the other is blue with red spots!! Drew: Yes, it's really strange. I've got another pair just like that at home.
Did you hear about the baby who swallowed a pin? It was OK. It was a safety pin.
What do you give a cat for its birthday? A catologue.
Anxiety: Getting up to see why the baby isn’t crying.
The town’s local council remarks that the best lawyer in town never made a donation to charity tendency. To convince him, the mayor calls him in his office: Sir, I remarked that you’re revenue reached a number of $600.000. With all these, you never made a donation to the charity... If you looked into my files, did you also remark that my mother is sick, and the medicaments she needs exceed her funds? No... answers mayor. In second place, my brother, war veteran, is condemned in a wheelchair and he’s blind. The mayor started apologizing, but was interrupted: And more, my sister died into a car accident and left tree children orphans. Stunned, the mayor says: I didn’t know, please accept my apologies... But the lawyer continues: I don’t see why I should give you any money, if I don’t ever give them money...
Our baby looks just like me. But that’s OK, as long as he’s healthy.
Yo mama so stupid, she went to a garage sale to buy a garage
Q: How are rape and an airplane similar? A: The ride gets more annoying when the kid starts screaming.
Q. What did the porcupine say to the cactus? A. "Is that you mommy?"