The best jokes about life

There was a man driving a pickup truck down a country road, when suddenly he was broad sided by a trailer truck. Some time went by, and the case got to court. The defense attorney said to the plaintiff, "How can you be suing my client now when you told a trooper after the accident that you felt fine?" The man replied. "Well sir, it was like this. We was driving down the road, minding our own business, when a big trailer truck came out of nowhere and creamed us. When I came to, I was in the ditch, and a trooper was pulling up with his car. He looked at the hogs, and they was most dead, so he shot them. Then he looked at my dog, and he was hurt real bad, so he shot him." Then he came over to me and he said, "How you feeling?" I said, "I never felt better in my life."
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has 69.85 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog, lawyer, life
All these Miley Cyrus jokes are whoreable.
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has 69.55 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life, music
Two campers are walking through the woods when a huge brown bear suddenly appears in the clearing about 50 feet in front of them. The bear sees the campers and begins to head toward them. The first guys drops his backpack, digs out a pair of sneakers, and frantically begins to put them on. The second guys says, "What are you doing? Sneakers won’t help you outrun that bear." "I don't need to outrun the bear," the first guy says. "I just need to outrun you."
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has 69.39 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: life
Mom can i buy some heels? No. Mom can i buy a bra? No. Mom can i buy a dress? No. Mom can i buy a barbie doll? No. You never let me buy anything! Shut up, Justin.
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has 69.39 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: life, music
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
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has 69.34 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, life, men, women
Doc, I think I need to wear glasses Indeed you have to, you are in a bank.
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has 69.28 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: life
My dotor told me: "I've tow news for U; one good and the other one bad, which one do U prefer to hear first?" I replied I prefer the good one. Doctor: "U will die after next 24 hours!" I told: "Then what is the bad newsrnDoctor: "I forgot to tell U yesterday!"
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has 69.22 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: communication, death, doctor, life, time
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I can't put it down.
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has 69.19 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: life
Do you know what a plateau is? It's the highest form of flattery!
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has 69.19 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: life
Q: Have you heard about McDonald's new Obama Value Meal? A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.
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has 69.19 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: food, life, money, political
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