The best jokes about life

Wearing a turtleneck shirt is like being strangled by a really weak person all day.
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has 63.17 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: beauty, life
Knock Knock. Who's there? Opportunity. Don't be silly - opportunity doesn't knock twice!
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has 63.09 % from 148 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, life
Life is a car wash … and I’m on a bicycle.
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: life
A lady buys some new furniture at Ikea. She reads the instuctions and builds the wardrobe. As soon as it"s built she a bus passes by and the wardrobe falls into pieces. The lady tries again and 5 minutes later another bus passes by and the wardrobe falls into pieces. The lady is furious and calls Ikea. Ikea tell her that they will send a worker to build it. When the worker arrives he builds the wardrobe and says: "Ok, I"m going to my next client." To which the lady says: "NO! Wait! You"ll see, as soon as a bus comes by it will dismantle itself..." The man agrees to stay to wait for the bus. After a while the man says that he better get in the wardrobe to see where the problem is when the bus passes by, to which the lady agrees. 10 minutes later the husband arrives and say"s: "Ahh lovely honey you bought us a new wardrobe..." He opens it up and say"s: "SIR! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" To which the worker replies: "I"m waiting for the bus!"
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: life
Doctor: "And how is it going with your old ailment, Mr Smith?" Patient: "Very well, I've been divorced for half a year now."
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has 63.00 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: divorce, doctor, life, relationship
Ignorance can be educated. Crazy can be medicated. But there is no cure for stupidity...
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: life
Q: How do you find Ronald McDonald in a nudist colony? A: Look for sesame seed buns.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, life
Without you I can't breath. I love you so much my nose.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: life, love
I'm tired 8 days a week.
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has 62.61 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: life, time
If life hands you lemons, break out the tequila!
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has 62.50 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: life
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