The best jokes about life

What Liberals & Conservatives Generally Do In Certain Situations If a conservative doesn't like guns, he doesn't buy one. If a liberal doesn't like guns, he wants all guns outlawed. If a conservative is a vegetarian, he doesn't` eat meat. If a liberal is a vegetarian, he wants all meat products banned for everyone. If a conservative sees a foreign threat, he thinks about how to defeat his enemy. If a liberal sees a foreign threat, he wonders how to surrender gracefully and still look good. If a conservative reads this, he'll forward it so his friends can have a good laugh. A liberal will delete it because he's "offended".
has 60.15 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: life
Boy asks his Gran nervously, "have you seen my pills ... they were labeled LSD ?" Gran replies "fuck your pills ! Have you seen the dragon in the kitchen ?!"
has 60.01 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: drug, life
If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of food.
has 59.95 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: animal, food, god, life
Did you hear about that music composer who commited suicide? He didn't even leave a note.
has 59.93 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: death, life, music
A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says ''Sorry we don't serve food in here''
has 59.80 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: life
How did Nicki Minaj know what Lil Wayne is giving her for Christmas? Lil Wayne isn't very good at wrapping.
has 59.80 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Christmas, life, music
What did the blanket say to the bed? Don't worry Ive got you covered!
has 59.75 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: life
If they bring shrimp home on shrimp boats, fish home on fish boats, and clams home on clam boats, what do they bring crabs home on? The Captains Dinghy!
has 59.74 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish, life
A man was drowning and asked God to help him. A boat came by wanting to help the man. The man refused and said that God would save him. The man drowned and went to heaven. He asked God why didn't you save me. God responded, "I sent a boat to get you and you did not get on."
has 59.66 % from 77 votes. More jokes about: god, life
My dick is too long and it causes some problems for me. On the other day when I with my girlfriend went to cinema suddenly I had an erection so that the shadow of my penis was reflected on the screen. Somebody from the corner shouted: "Mr bald sit down please we want to see the movie!"
has 59.51 % from 107 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, life
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