Customer: "Waiter, this soup tastes funny."
Waiter: "Funny? But then why aren’t you laughing?"
I know when god becomes angry.
When teenage girls get pregnant and their parents exclaim, "Oh god! What have you done?!"
Mexicans cross the border 1...2...and 4 at one time, never 3. why?
Because the sign says - no tres passing.
The organizers of the concert complain to the conductor of a choir:
You were supposed to bring a mixed choir, but I can see only men here.
But it is a mixed choir – half of them know how to sing, and the other half- do not.
The Highlander movie was actually based on Chuck Norris's life.
There can be only one.
Vote:
Q: What do you call a frog who wants to be a cowboy?
A: Hoppalong Cassidy.
The best thing about trying to name a baby is realizing how many people you hate.
Yo mama so stupid that when I was drowning I yelled out to her that I needed a life saver and she said "Cherry or grape?"
"Killed it" is a figure of speech implying someone stopped the banter.
To Chuck Norris that's just the motto of his life.
Vote:
The fastest dialog in the world:
(WC door is opening)
Man inside: Heyyy!
Man outside: Sorryyy!