Yo mama so stupid that when I was drowning I yelled out to her that I needed a life saver and she said "Cherry or grape?"
There’s one good thing about life. It’s only temporary.
Three men are sitting at a campfire telling stories about their great endeavors. The first man talked about how to sucked out the venom of a snake and sucked it up with 50 degree alcohol. The second man called it a circus trick as he has gotten 3 gunshots towards the chest and he but the guns in half. They looked at the third guy wanting to hear his story. Only to see him stroking his cock with the glowing hot coals.
Doctor doctor I feel that Im a pack of card. What can I do ? Doctor: I deal with you later.
Yo' Mama is so uptight, you need the jaws of life to part her legs.
"Doctor, please hurry. My son swallowed a razor-blade." "Don't panic, I'm coming immediately. Have you done anything yet?" "Yea, I shaved with the electric razor."
The fastest dialog in the world: (WC door is opening) Man inside: Heyyy! Man outside: Sorryyy!
I weighed myself today. It is clear I am too small for my weight.
Chuck Norris like life... lucky her.
"I hate being half bicycle-half motorcycle" he moped.