Coming home after check-up, 45 year old Jenna said to her husband: "The doctor said that my brust is like a 20 year old girl’ brust." Husband replied: "Did he mention about your 45 year old hanged to the floor ass?" "No", she said. "Your name wasn’t even mentioned."
I took two marriage vows. Silence and poverty.
Man to friend: ‘My wife’s a peach.’ Friend: ‘Because she’s so soft and juicy?’ Man: ‘No, because she has a heart of stone.’
Things have reached crisis point in Beryl’s marriage. ‘If things are so bad,’ her friend advises her. ‘Then you should leave your husband.’ ‘I would,’ says Beryl. ‘If only I could think of a way of doing it that wouldn’t make him happy.’
What kind of rings do men need for marriage? Engagement Ring Wedding Ring Suffe-Ring Endu-Ring
A friend of mine often tells to his wife: "It is better to be loved and almost the only one rather than to be the only one and almost loved…"
My wife is temperamental. Fifty per cent temper and 50 per cent mental.
Q: Why is a laundromat a really bad place to pick up women? A: Because a woman who can't afford her own washing machine won't be able to support you.
A wife tells her husband: "We never go out anywhere…" "Great, tomorrow I will be going to through our the garbage, you may join me…"
Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married. The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.