The best math jokes

Do you like maths? If so add a bed subtract your clothes divide your legs and we can multiply!
has 56.81 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: flirt, geek, math, sex
Q: Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? A: She didn't know what one came first.
has 56.20 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: blonde, math, stupid
DEPT OF STATISTICS: All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve. DEPT OF PSYCHOLOGY: Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books and assigns the first grade that comes to mind. DEPT OF HISTORY: All students get the same grade they got last year. DEPT OF RELIGION: Grade is determined by God. DEPT OF PHILOSOPHY: What is a grade? LAW SCHOOL: Students are asked to defend their position of why they should receive an A. DEPT OF MATHEMATICS: Grades are variable. DEPT OF LOGIC: If and only if the student is present for the final and the student has accumulated a passing grade then the student will receive an A else the student will not receive an A. DEPT OF COMPUTER SCIENCE: Random number generator determines grade. MUSIC DEPARTMENT: Each student must figure out his grade by listening to the instructor play the corresponding note (+ and - would be sharp and flat respectively). DEPT OF PHYSICAL EDUCATION: Everybody gets an A.
has 56.06 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: history, math, religious, school
A soccer coach walked into the locker room before a game, looked over to his star player and said: "I'm not supposed to let you play since you failed math, but we need you in there. So, what I have to do is ask you a math question, and if you get it right, you can play." The player agreed, and the coach looked into his eyes intently and asks: "Okay, now concentrate hard and tell me the answer to this. What is two plus two?" The player thought for a moment and then he answered: "I think... no... yes... I’m not sure... what about 4?" "Did you say 4?" the smiled coach exclaimed, excited that he got it right. At that, all the other players on the team began screaming: "Come on coach, give him another chance!"
has 55.64 % from 82 votes. More jokes about: game, math, soccer, sport
Life is like a definite integral. Integral from birthday to death ( LOVE ) dx = LIFE
has 55.57 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: life, love, math, nerd
I got 99 problems and being upside down ain't one. Ok wait I got 66 problems.
has 55.51 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: life, math
Teacher: "How much is half of 8?" Little Johnny: "Up and down or across?" Teacher: "What do you mean?" Little Johnny: "Well, up and down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0!"
has 55.22 % from 96 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, math
Q: Why did the mathbook kill himself? A: Because nobody understood him.
has 55.11 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: death, math
Q: What does the zero say to the the eight? A: Nice belt!
has 54.67 % from 85 votes. More jokes about: math
Q: What did the constipated mathematician do? A: He worked it out with a pencil!
has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: math, work
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