The best math jokes

The teacher asks a student "If you have $5 and billy takes $3, how much do you have left?" The student replies "Not enough for fucking lunch and billy ain't gonna have no got damn teeth left stealing my 3 dollars."
has 51.70 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: math, money, student, teacher, vulgar
A teacher asked a student to write 55. Student asked: How? Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5! The student wrote 5 and stopped. Teacher: What are you waiting for? Student: I don't know which side to write the other 5!
has 51.46 % from 223 votes. More jokes about: math, school, student, stupid, teacher
Chuck Norris can count the number of corners in a circle.
has 51.12 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
Q:Why is the number eight afraid of the number seven? A:Because seven ate nine.
has 51.11 % from 85 votes. More jokes about: math
A helium molecule walks in afterwards. The bellhop asks if he needs any help. Helium doesn't react.
has 51.00 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: math
So Descartes goes into a bar late one night for a beer. At closing time, the bartender makes Last Call and asks him, "Get you another?" Descartes replies, "I think not." And disappears.
has 50.54 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, beer, math
Did you hear about the mathematician with constipation ? He had to work it out with a pencil...
has 49.00 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: math
A man started to town with a fox, a goose, and a sack of corn. He came to a stream which he had to cross in a tiny boat. He could only take one across at a time. He could not leave the fox alone with the goose or the goose alone with the corn. How did he get them all safely over the stream? He took the goose over first and came back. Then he took the fox across and brought the goose back. Next he took the corn over. He came back alone and took the goose.
has 49.00 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal, math
What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
has 48.95 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: life, math
Why was the math textbook so sad? He had a lot of problems!
has 48.41 % from 549 votes. More jokes about: math
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