Chuck Norris can divide prime numbers into whole numbers.
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The bartender asks: "Would all three of you like some beer?"
The first one replies, "I don't know."
The second one replies, "I don't know either."
The third replies, "Yes."
A girl came skipping home from school one day.
"Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10.
See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,7, 8, 9, 10!"
"Very good," said her mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?"
"Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied.
The next day, the girl came skipping home from school.
"Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G.
See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mommy?" "Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde."
The next day the girl came skipping home from school.
"Mommy, Mommy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!"
And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs.
"Very good," said her embarrassed mother.
"Is it because I'm blonde, mommy?" "No, it's because you're 25."
Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
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The square root of Pain is Chuck Norris.
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Why is it hard for a blonde to count to 70?
Because 69 is such a mouthful.
Yo mammas so fat they had to make a new number.
On a high school math test, Chuck Norris put down "Violence" as every one of the answers.
He got an A+ on the test because Chuck Norris solves all his problems with Violence.
Vote:
Zenophobia: the irrational fear of convergent sequences.
How does a cow do math?
With a cowculator.