The best math jokes

E=mc squared. E multiplied by mc squared=Chuck Norris Roundhouse Kick.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
Teacher: "If you bought 8 hotdogs,9 cheese burgers and 7 fillet o fishes and you ate 8 hotdogs 9 cheese burger and 7 fillet o fish what do you have at the end?" Little Johnny: "A bad blatter issue."
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More jokes about: fish, food, health, little Johnny, math
Little Johnny's teacher asks him, "If I have 5 cookies, and I give you 2, how many cookies do I have left?" Little Johnny replies, "Zero, you're giving me more than just 3 cookies. I'm taking all 5 baby!" The teacher just facepalms herself. "I can strongly suggest that you work on your math skills Johnny." the teacher suggests. "Oh I know math, one man plus one girl, subtract a condom, equals a baby!" Little Johnny says.
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More jokes about: baby, dirty, little Johnny, math, teacher
Why was the math textbook so sad? He had a lot of problems!
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More jokes about: math
What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!
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More jokes about: life, math
The square root of Chuck Norris is pain. Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, math
Did you hear about the mathematician with constipation ? He had to work it out with a pencil...
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More jokes about: math
Two random variables were talking in a bar. They thought they were being discrete but I heard their chatter continuously.
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More jokes about: bar, math
Q: How many mathematicians does it take to change a lightbulb? A: On average or do you want the whole distribution?
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More jokes about: math
A mathematician and his best friend, an engineer, attend a public lecture on geometry in thirteen-dimensional space. "How did you like it?" the mathematician wants to know after the talk. "My head's spinning," the engineer confesses. "How can you develop any intuition for thirteen-dimensional space?" "Well, it's not even difficult. All I do is visualize the situation in n-dimensional space and then set n = 13."
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More jokes about: math


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