The best jokes about men

What's the difference between Big Foot and an intelligent man? Big Foot's been spotted several times.
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has 56.50 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: men
A boy is about to go on his first date, and is nervous about what to talk about. He asks his father for advice. The father replies: "My son, there are three subjects that always work. These are food, family, and philosophy." The boy picks up his date and they go to a soda fountain. Ice cream sodas in front of them, they stare at each other for a long time, as the boy's nervousness builds. He remembers his father's advice, and chooses the first topic. He asks the girl: "Do you like spinach?" She says "No," and the silence returns. After a few more uncomfortable minutes, the boy thinks of his father's suggestion and turns to the second item on the list. He asks, "Do you have a brother?" Again, the girl says "No" and there is silence once again. The boy then plays his last card. He thinks of his father's advice and asks the girl the following question: "If you had a brother, would he like spinach?"
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has 56.02 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: dating, men
Thanksgiving is the day men start getting in shape... to play Santa Claus.
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has 55.25 % from 51 votes. More jokes about: Christmas, fat, men, Santa, Thanksgiving
Q: The male sex has two hobbies. What are they? A: His left hand and his right hand.
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has 55.19 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: masturbation, men, sex
How can you tell if a man is aroused? He's breathing.
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has 54.87 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: men
Alex an Aussie builder was going through a house he had just built for the woman who owned it. She was telling him what colour to paint each room. They went into the first room and she said "I want this room to be painted a light blue." The builder went to the front door and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"  When he went back into the house, she told him that the next room was to be bright red. The builder went to the front door and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"  When he went back into the house, she told him that the next room was to be tan. The builder went to the front door and yelled "GREEN SIDE UP!"  When he came back, the lady was pretty curious, so she asked him "I keep telling you colours, but you go out the front and yell 'green side up' - what is that for?" The builder said, "Oh don't worry about that, I've just got a couple of Kiwi's laying the turf out front."
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has 54.77 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: men, women, work
Brrr! My hands are cold. Can I warm them in your heaving breasts?
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has 54.77 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, men, women
A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his cousin asked him, "How many women can a man marry?" "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an answer so quickly. "How do you know that?" "Easy," the little boy said. "All you have to do is add it up, like the Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer"
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has 54.65 % from 202 votes. More jokes about: marriage, math, men, wedding, women
Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's our job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something we'd want to have dinner with.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: food, men, wine, work
I'm busy. You're ugly. Have a nice day.
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has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
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