The best money jokes

The newest therapy for healing the states of depression is so-called decapitation. It costs only 100 dollars but 50 dollars pays the health insurance company. The operation will be made only once and you will never feel depressive. I had also luck and I also gave an order to this kind of therapy. I wish well to myself.
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has 58.56 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: health, money
George had responded to a call from his attorney, insisting that they meet at once. He arrived at his lawyer's firm, and was ushered into his office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?" the lawyer asked. "Well, if those are my choices, I guess I'll take the bad news first." "Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars." "That's the bad news?" George was stunned? "If you call that bad, I can't wait to hear the terrible news." "The terrible news is that it's of you and your secretary."
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: lawyer, money, office, wife
Knock knock. Who's there? Cash. Cash who? Yes! I've always known you were a bit nutty!
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: knock-knock, mean, money
Q: Why did two women walk into a saloon pointing bananas at people and shouting: "GIVE US YER LOOT!" A: They were both blonds.
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has 58.52 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: blonde, money, stupid
How much money did the bronco have? Only a buck!
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has 58.51 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, money
An young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. After sex the girl said, "I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I'am actually a hooker, and I charge $100 for what we just did." The man retorted, "And I should have mentioned this before, but I'am actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $200."
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has 58.06 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: money
The proprietor of an adult store steps out to run a few errands and leaves his employee in charge. A woman comes in and wants to purchase a dildo. She looks at the shelf behind the register. "How much for the white one?" "$10." "How much for the black one?" "$20." She buys the white one. A little later , another woman comes in and also wants to buy a dildo. After asking the clerk for prices, she decides on the black one. A third lady comes in for a dildo. She checks the price of the white one , the black one and asks about the plaid one. She makes her purchase and leaves.The proprietor returns and asks how things went. "Great! I sold a white one, a black one, and I got thirty buck for your thermos!"
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has 57.62 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: dirty, masturbation, money, women
Yo' Mama is so poor, she steals her breakfast from backyard bird feeders.
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has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: bird, insulting, money, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so poor, her face is on the food stamp.
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has 57.36 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: insulting, money, Yo mama
A blonde was trying to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had almost 230,000 miles on it. One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, “There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it’s not legal.” “That doesn’t matter,” replied the blonde, “if I can only sell the car.” “Okay,” said the brunette. “Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will ‘fix it’. Then you shouldn’t have a problem anymore trying to sell your car.” The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, “Did you sell your car?” “No,” replied the blonde, “Why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!”
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has 57.35 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: blonde, car, money, stupid
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