The best money jokes

‘I used to live in a sub-basement. The janitor that had the apartment during the Depression had some stocks. When the market crashed, he was wiped out. He tried to kill himself by jumping out of the window and up on to street level.’ Woody Allen
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has 17.55 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money
Harry’s so cheap, he didn’t buy his wife a pearl necklace, he got her a length of string and told her to start a collection.
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has 17.34 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: money
Why shouldn't you carry two half dollars in your pocket? Because two halves make a whole (hole), and you could lose your money.
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has 17.31 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: money
Uncle Harry is very rich. His dog was lonely so he bought it a boy to play with. ‘He’s spending a year dead for tax purposes.’ Douglas Adams
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has 16.16 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
The best things in life are free, plus tax.
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has 16.16 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
He was so mean that when he found a pack of corn plasters he went out and bought a pair of tight shoes.
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has 16.16 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: money
Did you hear about the Wall Street investment banker who won $10 million in the lottery? He's so happy that he's giving some serious thought to paying back his student loan.
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has 16.13 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: money
At the Cedar Rapids Chamber of Commerce meeting the treasurer reported a deficit of two hundred dollars. One of the chamber members stood up and said, "I vote that we donate half of it to the Red Cross and then give the other fifty dollars to the Salvation Army."
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has 15.98 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: money
A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I dont, Ive been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked, and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, Ive been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."
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has 14.67 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: business, money, travel
At the Cedar Rapids Chamber of Commerce meeting the treasurer reported a deficit of two hundred dollars. One of the chamber members stood up and said, "I vote that we donate half of it to the Red Cross and then give the other fifty dollars to the Salvation Army."
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has 14.67 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: money
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